Will you marry “moi” ?

In my last piece we learned about the whimsical wedding traditions and customs of France… In this second piece we will explore the various customs and traditions of ITALY. Soon to follow, will be the ones of England and the U.S.A. We hope you have fun reading these, and perhaps even incorporate them into your own wedding celebration…

Italian Wedding Customs

Whenever I think of Italy I think of the magnificent Italian Opera! … Here is a crash course …Opera was born in Italy around the year 1600 and has continued to play a dominant role in everyday life until the present day. The Italian opera had three stages namely the baroque, the romantic and the modern. Although many famous operas were written by foreign composers, such as Mozart, Handel and Gluck, the 19^th and 20^th centuries brought us Bellini, Rossini, Verdi and Puccini. Today we enjoy the brilliant and crystal clear voices of the “famous three”, Andrea Bocelli, Jose Carreras and of course the late Luciano Pavarotti. Opera is still very much alive in Italy today and is enjoyed at some Italian weddings. In fact, the evidence of the very first opera performed in Italy was at the wedding of Marie de Medici to Henry IV of France. Here are some customs you will enjoy:

Contact: In Italy the bride and the groom do not see or speak to each before the wedding ceremony, no contact is allowed.

Serenade: In some parts of Italy, a party, known as a Serenade, is thrown outside of the bride’s home by the groom the night before the wedding. His family and friends come and wait for the bride until she appears. The groom then sings to his bride to further seduce her. Once his song is sung, the party is invited by the parents of the bride for a buffet offered by the parents of the bride.

Dote: In France it is called “Trousseau” but in Italy this is referred to as “Dote”. This bundle is the trousseau which is assembled by the bride-to-be. In it she would include not only household items for everyday use in her new home but also her personal wardrobe.

Ambasciata: In the past, Italian weddings were organized by a family member, in some cases a matchmaker would carry a message or “ambasciata” to the bride-to-be’s family in the hope to be accepted. If the bride’s family found the fiancé’s proposal acceptable, there would be wedding bells.

Sposa Bagnata, Sposa Fortunata: This literally translate to “Wet Bride, Lucky Bride”, traditionally if it rains on your wedding day, you will have a very fortunate marriage! The rain symbolizes abundance and good luck which will spill over onto the new family.

Di Venere e di Marte ne’si Sposa ne’si Parte: Old saying meaning “On Friday and Tuesdays one does not marry and one does not depart” – Why Tuesday and Friday? Tuesday is the day of the God of war “Mars”, while Friday, according to the Cabala is the day in which the evil spirits had been created. In some other countries Friday is the most romantic day because it is under the protection of Venus, the God of love and harmony, … you be the judge… perhaps there is some good and bad in each of those days !!!

The Mirror: The groom should never see the bride’s dress and the bride should never look at herself in the mirror on her wedding day. Brides caught doing so must have removed a shoe or a glove before attempting this.

The Wedding Procession: In some small villages of Italy, it is still customary for the groom to walk the bride and the wedding party to the church. Sometimes they encounter several obstacles on the way, such as a broom which the bride picks up to symbolize that she will keep a clean home, or a crying baby whom if she comforts, means she will be a good mother.

Cutting of the Tie: This is a very old custom which consist of the groom’s tie which is cut into multiple pieces by the best man. The latter will sell off the pieces to wedding guests raising money for tips or other costs associated with the wedding extravaganza…

Borsa: The bride carries a satin pouch, called Borsa to receive gifts or money at the reception. Sometimes the pouch is guarded by the bride’s grand-mother during the festivities, and believe me no one gets by Grandmama!

The Wedding Bouquet: It is the groom who buys the bouquet for the bride. This was of “Orange blossoms symbolizing “purity and virginity”.

The Venetian Table: In Sicilian customs, the dessert course is often presented as a Venetian Table, a dazzling array of pastries, fruits, coffees, cakes, presented in great quantity with much celebration. This is often called Venetian Hour.

Per Cen’tanni: This is a traditional wedding toast signifying “for a hundred years”; drinks are then passed around by the best-man.

Bomboniera: This refers to both paper confetti as well as white sugar coated almonds for purity. As the bride and groom make their way to their wedding car, they are showered with rice (sign of abundance and prosperity). A pair of white doves is sometimes released to signify the joy and bond of the new couple (doves remain a couple for their entire life). In ancient Roman times guests would throw grains and nuts, money and rice, this custom is still alive today in some parts of Italy.

Shattered Plate: At the conclusion of the wedding ceremony, the bride and groom traditionally smash a plate together. Depending on the number of broken pieces, it is meant to signify the number of years of happy marriage they will enjoy as husband and wife.

After dessert, dancing commences, gifts are given, and the guests eventually begin to leave. In Southern Italy, as the guests leave, they hand envelopes of money to the bride and groom, who return the gift with a wedding favor, a small token of appreciation.

More Italian Traditions: The bed is prepared the night before the wedding by two unmarried young women, sign of purity! The throwing of the bouquet at the end of the ceremony means that the girl who catches it will soon receive a marriage proposal. In ancient times the bouquet was made of orange blossoms representing abundance, happiness and prosperity. The tradition of holding the bride in your arms while you pass by the new house dates back to the Roman times; this was to avoid the bride from tripping which would be bad luck meaning the Divine spirits did not want to welcome her to the new home.

Resources: www.wikipedia.com, www.worldweddingcustoms.com, www.weddingstyle.suite101.com, www.betterhotseach.com,

We thank you for reading and hope you have enjoyed these fun Italian wedding traditions… As always should you need further information on the subject please do not hesitate to let us know. Please stay tuned for our next article on American wedding traditions.